Welcome to Friday Fictioneers, the best flash fiction in town! Each week– on Wednesday, not Friday, writers from all over the world throw their hats in the ring, and respond to a photo prompt. Rochelle Wisoff-Fields leads our merry band, and this week Danny Bowman provides the muse. Join us or check out other stories, on Rochelle’s blog, Addicted to Purple.
© copyright Danny Bowman
(98 Words)
“Every time I organize the kitchen cabinets, you grab the cereal or something, and put it back wherever you want! It feels like what I do just doesn’t matter!”
Gina’s voice grew increasingly unsteady as she faced her husband.
“For thirteen years, I’ve tried telling you what bothers me, and you dismiss my feelings. ”
She could feel her heart race and her palms grow sweaty, as she tried to tell him how she felt.
Ray smiled. “Honey, let’s not make a mountain out of a mole hill.”
Gina reached for the cast iron skillet. Right where she left it.
* * *
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TALES FROM THE MOTHERLAND 
Oh no, I sense big trouble brewing on this kitchen… How many times have I stood there and experienced much the same thing and considered the closeness of the frying pan or scissors – no too much blood…
Lovely take on the prompt Dawn
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Thanks Dee. I was thinking the same thing… saw that photo, thought Mountain out of a mole hill… and it all came to me. Yes, the mess would be more than I want to deal with. 😉
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Oh, yes, the epitome of patronizing. It feels horrible when someone tries to downplay our feelings, as if they’re not worth having. It’s rarely about the little things, anyway. It’s usually a culmination of little thing after little thing that leads to the frustration. To have that brushed aside as if it were a mere over-reaction is hurtful.
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Nicely done, by the way!
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😀
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Indeed! I think most of us can relate to Gina’s situation… perhaps not the clubbing part, but the agitation for sure. Thanks Carrie!
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Mole hill? Mole hill! You wanna see a mole hill? I’ll show you a mole hill, Mr.! Oh, I could feel the tension rise in this episode. Nice work!
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Thanks Honie! Yes… it is one of those things where it just builds and builds, until, well, of course, we club someone. 😉
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Great pun, so good I groaned while I laughed 😉
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Thanks Helen! I was hoping folks would see the humor… as well as the deep despair in this. 😉
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Been there, got the T shirt. If you want to know where anything is in my kitchen, it’s where my husband last used it. Nice one, made me smile.
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Don’t I know it sistah! It’s not mystery why this story came to me so quickly. Glad you enjoyed it Sandra.
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Wrong choice of words. Poor guy won’t even see it coming when she flies off the handle.
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Cast iron skillet… right where SHE left it. 😉
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You just got me thinking… I went back and changed the ending.
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An excellent change. Love it!
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Thought it might be right up your alley… you darker Fictioneers are wearing off on me!
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Clever take on the prompt, Dawn. Anger is certainly building there and he seems totally unaware of it. He’s probably reading the paper or something and can’t see her expression.
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Thanks Patricia! More likely: he does see her expression, but doesn’t take is seriously… like her requests that he listen.
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Intense!
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If you follow the Friday Fictioneers (emphasis on FICTION), they are a dark group. I figured I’d jump in this week. 😉
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Well I’d say it is definitely a mountain now. Marriage counseling anyone?
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Coroner anyone? 😉
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Ha! I missed the title, and was going to comment;…”and that’s why I killed him, your honour.” But then I caught the title — PERFECTION!
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Thanks! Originally, the final line wasn’t there… you had to catch the title. But, a few people missed it, and when I was commenting to Adam, ding ding ding! The new ending came to me. Glad you liked it Miz Hann-Basquiat!
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Ha! What woman can’t relate to this? Nicely done 🙂
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Right? I’m pretty sure most of us wouldn’t actually pick up the pan and do anything with it, but it may have entered our minds! 😉 thanks for stopping by and taking the time to read and comment, Sara. Much appreciated!
Sent from Dawn’s iPhone
>
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Of course not 🙂 Still…
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Indeed. 😉
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…a little disturbing that you ere inspired to this by such a serene image! 😉
That being said, HE HAD IT COMING!!!
Fun tale.
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Well my friend, every week this group of Fictioneers goes all dark on my ass, and I’m always the odd man out. I figured I’d just join in this week. Generally, I see the photo each week and whatever first sentence or phrase that comes to mind, is what I work off of. The mountain/mole hill phrase came instantly and then the domestic scene came quickly behind. Had to write it. 😉
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Lovely tension building in this. And just that little use of italics right at the end, says it all.
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Thanks Clair. I do love italics… they can say so much.
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Whack-a-mole, anyone? Too funny, probably because most of us have been there. I prefer the rolling pin.
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If I actually baked, I might have thought of the rolling pin… but I’ve only used mine a half dozen times, ever. However, my great grandmother’s cast iron pan… that seems like it could do some damage! Thanks Patii.
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I went with cast iron and dark as well. 🙂
janet
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That mole hill just got a LOT bigger! Good one, Dawn!
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Thanks Cathy! It’s fun to go dark… from time to time.
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I love this post. It starts out like any normal conversation and escalates quickly, thus sucking in the reader. This could be a scene in a drama or a cartoon. It could be funny or it could get bloody. Regardless, you have accomplished a major writer’s objective – to immediately capture the reader’s imagination, which is not a given. Your talent shows here, and your readers are expressing their appreciation. Good work, Dawn! – Mike
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I felt the weight of my own pan as I read your words. What an explosion of pent up emotion, nicely penned. Perfect.
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Thanks so much! I really appreciate your thoughtful comment!
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Dear Dawn,
AARRRRRGGGH! A mountain out of a molehill? Can you say systematic minimization? Oh yeah, been there, done that, have the permanent teeth marks in my tongue to prove it. Justifiable clubbing IMHO.
Clever use of the prompt and a title that adds another hundred words. Love it! Love it! Love it!
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Wow! You just made my day Rochelle! Thanks for this wonderful comment! MUCH appreciated today. 🙂
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“I’ll mountain out of a molehill YOU!!” were probably the last words he heard. (Or, if he’s lucky, something a bit pithier) I’m a bit of a neat freak myself, and if someone can’t be bothered to put things where they belong, then how did they survive for so long? Obviously this guy just met his end—or got damn close! Hilarious read!
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Thanks so much Hala! I appreciate you taking the time to read my story and comment. I love getting the feedback. 🙂
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Thank God he did not use that skillet or shecould not have found it handy to use- wonder if the volcano burst out of the mountain she created in the end-on his head?lol!Am still laughing-this was ingenious,Dawn 😀
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Thanks so much. I’m glad I made you laugh! Is there anything much better than getting readers to laugh? 😉
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I agree-nothing-I love to laugh and wish I could write humour:-)
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Ah, domestic bliss. The title doesn’t leave much to the imagination as to what happened next either – he should have thought more carefully about which bits of the kitchen he messed about with. Hiding the skillet would have been a start!
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Not the right thing to say at that point.
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Indeed. Thanks for stopping by R.E.; I really appreciate you taking the time to read and comment.
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He had it comin’. ;D
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He did indeed!
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He better not misplace that skillet. It’s funny how these little thing add up, and oh, do they add up! I have this issue all the time, myself. Great story, Dawn!
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I’ve never had this issue… I mean, this is fiction, right? 😉
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Let me explain…I have this issue with my husband always moving my stuff around. 🙂 He’s very OCD. That’s all I meant.
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Um, I mean the same thing… I should have added a sarcastic emoticon. My husband is exactly the same way… and I happen to have an amazing cast iron pan. 😉
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Oh, you too, huh? Amazing how that happens. It could be the littlest thing…and then, where is it, where is it? It can drive me crazy! Ha ha. Be careful with that pan, Dawn. 🙂
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The pan’s been in the family for about 100 years… makes me wonder how many husbands have driven the women in my family nuts! And how many women have held it and thought… 😉
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two stories of iron skillets so far this week.. I think there is a mountain out there..
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I know! I was amazed to see Janet’s story… who woulda thunk?
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I can relate to this story. Nice one, Dawn!
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Thanks Tiffany! It was fun to write…
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I imagine it was!
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ha! wonderful blend of humor and horror. the pent up anger and frustration was palpable 🙂
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Thanks KZ… coming from you, that is a real compliment!
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Bang bang Gina’s cast iron skillet came down on his head…..
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And that’s the way the story goes… 😉 Thanks for stopping by, Subroto; much appreciated!
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Oh I’ve been there. I am there now in fact, in the middle of a major sort-out of every room in the house.
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Amazing how it never ends… I keep thinking that one day, my insistence that only cereal be on the cereal shelf will take hold. But alas… Welcome to Tales From the Motherland, Siobhan. I appreciate you taking the time to read my story and share a comment. Hope you’ll check out others, and jump in again. 😉
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That will learn him! She might regret it though soon after! I wonder if the jury will shake their heads and call it “justifiable homicide”? 🙂
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I wonder if she’ll stick around to find out? Or, if they’ll find him? Thanks for stopping by Sarah! 😉
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I guess after all those years she finally snapped. Of course, the skillet would be where she left it – it doesn’t sound like something he would use!
Great story.
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Thanks! She clearly lost it… in the end. Really glad you enjoyed it.
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There’s always something to be said for everything in its place and a place for everything. He obviously didn’t cook. Love the story, Dawn.
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Thanks, Karen. It’s fun to go dark, once in a while. 😉
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