Friday Fictioneers is a weekly Flash Fiction challenge that features writers from all over the world. Use the photo prompt to write a 100-word story and join this group of Kool Kats, led by our talented and generous leader Rochelle Wisoff-Fields. Check out her blog Addicted Purple, to read more stories, learn more, or join in. The photo this week was sent in by Douglas MacIlroy.
What a haunting image! While I think I know what it is, I’m taking a stab at Science Fiction in honor of Earth Day. I always appreciate honest, constructive feedback; please leave a comment.
Requiem For The Sun
“Do you ever dream of fresh strawberries, Da?”
“Don’t be silly, Ginny, we’ve got fresh berries whenever we want.”
“Not the ones that grew in fresh garden soil– you remember? The ones you and Ma grew … before the sun grew cold.”
Seamus gazed out the podhole at the icy land.
“No sense wishing for things we can’t have, luv. We’ve done fine with our “growing pods.” We have everything we had when the land was green: streams with fish, fruit trees… safety from the cold and ice.”
“Aye, Da, we’ve managed to recreate everything– but sun and fresh air.”
(100 words, exactly)
* * *
Make me smile; HELP ME REACH MY GOAL: I’d love to see the Tales From the Motherland Facebook page reach 500 likes in 2014. Have you stopped by to spread some fairy dust? Follow me on Twitter, it’s where I’mforced to be brief. Most importantly, if you like a post I’ve written, hit Like and leave a comment. I love to hear what readers think. Honest, positive or constructive feedback is always welcome. Click Follow; you’ll get each new post delivered by email, with no spam. If you see ads on this page, please let me know. They shouldn’t be there. ©2015 Please note, that all content and images on this site are copyrighted to Dawn Quyle Landau and Tales From the Motherland, unless specifically noted otherwise. If you want to share my work, please give proper credit. Plagiarism sucks.
Interesting take on the earth’s future, Dawn. For the most part, I enjoyed the story. It’s true that there are some things well never be able to recreate. The last line seems just a little stilted for dialogue, but the sentiment and the warning are worth heeding.
All my best,
MG
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks MG. I see what you mean by that last line… I may play with it. 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
Excellent, Dawn. It’s like our water problem. Some have plenty and others are praying for more. The problem is when the damage has been done and we are stuck like we are. Well done!
LikeLike
Thanks Amy. It is so depressing to me, that we seem to be on a course that is not going to change… I continue to hope, but don’t feel especially hopeful.
LikeLiked by 1 person
So sad! Climate warming will have dire consequences for us all.
DJ
LikeLike
It already has had dire consequences for so many… but what doesn’t affect us directly, doesn’t matter as much to many.
Thanks so much for stopping by Tales From the Motherland, Danny. Your time and effort are much appreciated.
LikeLike
My pleasure. Seems to me that most people don’t care about global warming. Doesn’t effect them and they don’t give a hoot about future generations.
DJ
LikeLiked by 1 person
Well done, Dawn.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks Cathy!
LikeLike
A good story for Earth Day. We need to cherish what we have.
LikeLike
We do indeed! Thanks Jan.
LikeLike
An apocalyptic story – frequently some of my favourite types 🙂
This is no exception, I enjoyed the very personal approach here. The revealing through dialogue works well.
Cheers
KT
LikeLike
Thanks KT. I’m a fan of dialogue… and while this is not my genre, it’s fun to try something new!
LikeLiked by 1 person
The image didn’t haunt me because I recognised it. Now I’ve seen all the divers and wonderful takes on it, I wonder whether that was a curse or a blessing?
Good piece of scifi.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks Mick. It was fun to try something new.
LikeLike
You’re early! I wasn’t expecting you until tomorrow. But a fine tale nevertheless.
LikeLike
Thanks Sandra! I used to post on Wednesday every time… I’ve drifted off course, but would love to get back to Wednesdays. 🙂 Glad you liked it.
LikeLiked by 1 person
A chilling, and possibly prophetic story. Well done.
I’d try, “except sunshine and fresh air” in that last sentence – and we are “led by our”….etc. 🙂
LikeLike
Thanks so much Archon, and glad to see you on Tales From the Motherland. I tried “except sunshine and fresh air,” but thought there were too many “s” sounds back to back. I don’t think it flows as nicely. I’m not sure where you are suggesting I put the “led by our?” I appreciate the suggestions.
LikeLike
I’m sorry. I was commenting late at night, and time and intelligence were waning. In your prologue, above the actual story, you have “this group of Kool Kats, lead by our talented and generous leader Rochelle Wisoff-Fields.”
lead (leed) present-tense verb – to conduct, to guide
lead (led) noun – material bullets are made from
led (led) past-tense of above verb
I believe you intended to use the third word. These three are easy to mix up, and I’m a little (lot) OCD about homonyms. 🙄
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh man! Well, I totally missed the typo, but yes– I do know the difference! Thanks Archon. 🙂
LikeLike
😀 I’m never sure. Some people wish to improve, but others become quite incensed to have mistakes pointed out.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Good story Dawn. What concerns me is that those who can afford it will have all those wonderful scientific benefits, while most of the poor will have struggled and died out. It’s like the movie “2012.” Well written as always. — Suzanne
LikeLiked by 1 person
Sadly, that seems all too likely… survival of the “haves.” Thanks for taking the time Suzanne; it’s always appreciated!
LikeLike
This is scarily believable because due to smog and pollution the future is out there already.
LikeLike
It scares me that is so possible…
LikeLike
This is the first I’ve read here. It’s similar to mine…in a way.
LikeLike
Welcome to Tales From the Motherland, Karyn and to Friday Fictioneers. I’m sure you’ll quickly see how addictive FF is! I appreciate you taking the time to read and comment.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Somethings can never be re-created. Good one.
LikeLike
That’s for sure! Thanks so much.
LikeLike
This is good SF. I like the elements of it introduced through the dialogue.
LikeLike
Thanks so much Rants! How fun to see you here– thanks for making the time! It’s much appreciated.
LikeLike
Word!
LikeLike
What a dull world that would be.
LikeLike
What a dull, flat world indeed! Thanks Louise.
LikeLiked by 1 person
It’s at least hopeful.
LikeLike
Thanks, Dawn… “at least?”
LikeLike
Yeah, I mean being without sunshine and fresh air sounds like a bummer but “at least” there is fresh food.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ah! Got it… I thought maybe I was missing something. Duh. 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
What worked for me in this passage was the combination of characters that revealed a little of both the optimistic and the pessimistic. Regardless of your word choices (referred to in previous comments), some of both the light side and the dark side were revealed. It makes good science fiction because you incorporated real science.
It would be nice if it was also ‘real fiction,’ but alas, the story line seems all to real. Nice Earth Day tribute! – Mike
LikeLike
Thanks so much, Mike. I’m not sure which phrasing would really work best, but I’m glad you liked it… regardless. 😉
LikeLike
Sun and fresh air. Well, something to work on anyway. 😀 Nice story, Dawn! Always a pleasure reading your stuff.
LikeLike
Kent! How wonderful to hear from you… I’ve missed you and your stories! Thanks for stopping by. 🙂
LikeLike
Thanks, Dawn. I haven’t forgotten you or anybody, just been busy doing things … mostly for Rochelle promoting her novel. We’re pumped here! And, yes, I have a story this week. Hope you like it. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
So this sun did finally cooled and life continued. Great imagination.
LikeLike
Clearly Science Fiction. 😉 Thanks for stopping by yarnspinnerr!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Dear Dawn,
Stepping out of your comfort zone shows your versatility and adventurous nature. Good job.
Shalom,
Rochelle
LikeLike
Thanks Rochelle… it’s fun to step out sometimes. 😉
LikeLike
We do take so much for granted don’t we? Great story for Earth Day Dawn.
LikeLike
Thanks Dee– we do inDEEd. 😉
LikeLike
That last line is so foreboding. I have goosebumps!
LikeLike
Wonderful! That’s what a writer wants to hear. 😉 Thanks for stopping byTales From the Motherland, Lorna. I appreciate you taking the time to read and comment!
LikeLiked by 1 person
I alway love to read great writing! The pleasure was mine. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Doug’s picture and your idea of “growing pods” brings this picture into an icy, unwelcome focus. Well done, Dawn!
LikeLike
Thanks Alicia! I love the photo, and my head instantly went in that direction.
LikeLike
Dear Dawn, Yes, I would miss fresh air and the sunlight for sure. That is the stuff that depression is made of – not having a plentiful supply! Nan
LikeLiked by 1 person
Me too, Nan! Something has to change, or we may all find ourselves facing this.
LikeLike
You’ve painted a bleak picture, Dawn. I can see it well–too well for my liking.
However, you did a fantastic job with the dialogue and weaving a strong story.
LikeLike
Thanks Russell. I wanted to go pure fiction this week… after 2 weeks of thinly veiled non-fiction. 😉
LikeLike
Great story for Earth Day, sadly within the realm of possibility. We better watch out to keep our warm sunlight and fresh air. Even today, that’s not a given everywhere anymore.
LikeLike
No it’s not; we absolutely need to make some important changes! Thanks for your feedback, gahlearner.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Sunlight and fresh air are precious. Who knows what the future holds for our Earth, but I’d hate to lose these two things. Powerful story.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks Margaret; I agree, that would be truly horrible. I’m glad you enjoyed this. Thanks for your feedback!
LikeLike
The best adaptation to a bad situation always, still, has a cost.
Good tale. Randy
LikeLike
Thanks so much, Randy. Isn’t that the truth! Thanks for taking the time; it’s much appreciated.
LikeLike
A very disturbing look into a possible future for the Earth. No sun or fresh air … and growing pots! What a terrible prospect. We certainly need to make drastic changes in order not to let things reach that state. A thought-provoking story, and so well written.
LikeLike
Thanks so much Millie. I appreciate your thoughtful feedback.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Very impressive Dawn – the perfect story for an eerie photo. Years ago (1972 to be exact) Bruce Dern starred in a movie called “Silent Running” which addressed this issue nicely – except he was in outer space. Here’s a link to the Youtube trailer:
~James
LikeLike
Eek… Bruce Dern is an amazing actor. Hard to believe how many years have passed! Thanks for the movie link, and feedback, James; it’s much appreciated.
LikeLike
Oh I thought I had left a comment,.. The thought of life without soil and sun can not be compensated with any strawberries from pods.. A life like that seams dreadful.
LikeLike
Even strawberries from Sweden! 😉 I could not agree more, Björn! Thanks for the feedback.
LikeLike
Nice piece of SF, bleak future softened by that lovely dialog.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks so much! It’s fun to venture into new places sometimes. 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
The line “before the sun grew cold” is rather haunting. I’m impressed anytime someone writes flash fiction. It’s really tough to pull off these short pieces and this one delivers a strong message while still entertaining. Nicely done!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks so much Laurel Leigh. I really appreciate your feedback. I love this weekly challenge… it’s fun and addictive, and has really helped my writing overall.
LikeLike
I’m a fan of anything that keeps you writing, and I admire your discipline for sticking to a writing schedule amidst all the distractions of life. Plus great fun for all of us who get to read your shorts!
LikeLike
YOU are too kind. But thanks for this smile today. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person