Two weeks in a row. Maybe this is something to celebrate? I’m grateful for the inspiration, as I sit on a plane, headed home again–– this time for a long while. I will read other stories and catch up, and I thank all of you who encouraged me this past week. I’ve so missed the positive energy of our FF community. Thanks to Rochelle Wisoff-Fields for keeping this space positive and open to all. Mazel tov on your fourth anniversary! As always I appreciate honest, constructive feedback.
© Peter Abbey
What She Holds On To, As The Colors Fade
The lush green moss was cool and velvety against my bare breasts. It was a wild and precious moment: pulling up my shirt and lying there, hoping other hikers wouldn’t come along and judge. Those spontaneous moments were exquisite.
The smell of fresh cut grass filled our house, and I inhaled deeply. Happy.
“This move will mean greener pastures for our family,” my beloved told me, just before we left our families. He was always right.
Green has filled my life with joy; I’ve been blessed. Now there is little time left, and these green walls close in on me.
(Exactly words)
* * *
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©2011-2016 All content and images on this site are copyrighted to Dawn Quyle Landau and Tales From the Motherland, unless specifically noted otherwise. If you want to share my work, I’m grateful, but please give proper credit and Link back to my work; plagiarism sucks!
TALES FROM THE MOTHERLAND 
Great last line. Was all set for a happy tale until that foreboding twist.
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A good life, is a good life… but the end isn’t always what we hope for. Working at Hospice, I see that a lot. Thanks for taking the time, Lain; much appreciated!
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The sense of green and coolness was all around me as I read
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So glad to hear that, Neil; that’s what I was aiming for. Thanks for taking the time!
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My husband will tell you that green is my favourite colour. I love that image of her pressing her body against moss – both startling and calming. Wonderful
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The moss part might be less fiction ( 😉 ) and green is one of my very favorite colors too! As a painter and art lover, color is something I have a hard time picking a favorite with. So many wonderful options! SO nice to see you in my comments again, Claire!
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What a lovely, dark tale, even with all that green.
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How wonderful to find you in my comments again, Jen! Just made my day… as for dark, I just think that the end is not always what we hope for, and that’s what I was aiming for here. Thanks for taking the time; it means a lot!
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Even in her closing hours, she has an attitude of gratitude. “I’ve been blessed.”
Great use of the sense here. I could feel the cool, damp moss and smell the fresh-cut grass.
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Thanks so much Russell, you nailed what I am going for! So many read darkness in this, but really it’s just the (sometimes) inevitable sadness of facing an ending. Overall, I saw her as grateful too. Thanks for the wonderful feedback; I appreciate it!
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Dear Dawn,
There’s a sweet peace about this even through it’s obvious she’s dying. Dying with no regrets and gratitude. Lovely.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Thanks Rochelle; I’m glad that you and Russell saw what I was putting out there. I love how each reader sees what they uniquely see! It’s one of the best parts of FF. xo
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What Russel said, touch and smell are strong. Sad but also lovely story.
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Thanks so much Gabriele; the feedback means a lot to me!
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I could feel and smell the fresh open space. Such a sad ending though.
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Thanks Clare; I appreciate your thoughtful feedback. Working at Hospice, I see a lot of this. A happy life is still hard to give up. Endings are often hard.
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A full ride through a full life, all emotions and senses in tact. Beautiful. xo
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Thanks Julie; I really appreciate you stopping by and sharing your feedback! It means a lot. xo
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Welcome back! I totally missed your story last week but will try to visit. The sense of breasts in the green grass made me shiver. Perhaps because it is windy and damp outside. My favorite color is green so I easily related to the peace in your tale.And helped me avoid the impending terror.
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No terror, just the potential for feeling sad at seeing it all end. Green evokes so many things for me, but moss on naked skin… ahh, that is sublime! Thanks for the feedback darlin’!
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I see that now. (Went back to reread.) Perhaps just a sense of loss.
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A great tale, thank you! You have a big talent with words.
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Thank you SO much Cecilia; that is so kind, and means so much! Trying to find my groove again, and appreciate any and all feedback. Thanks for taking the time!
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It’s funny… I don’t read darkness in here at all. I love her attitude (have been accused of having the same type myself!) Beautifully written, Dawn
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Thanks Dale; I’m glad it was’t sad for everyone! I think regret at the end, is not surprising for so many, but it doesn’t negate the happiness she lived. Thanks for the feedback!
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Reblogged this on ugiridharaprasad.
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Thanks so much for sharing my work; it’s much appreciated!
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Pingback: Friday Fictioneers: What She Holds On To, As The Colors Fade | ugiridharaprasad
There’s a sting in this tale, but I’ll hold onto the thought that she’s been blessed.
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Thanks Liz; I like that assessment too! So many folks aren’t ready to let go, or see the end, but the beauty before means something as well. Thanks so much for the feedback; I really appreciate it!
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Such an evocative piece, with a worrying downturn at the end there. Beautifully done, Dawn.
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Thanks Sandra; your thoughts are much appreciated!
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There are worse ways to go, as you already know (working in Hospice). I think she managed to keep a bit of freedom on her way out. Beautifully written, I could almost feel coolness of the moss. Two in a row, you are back! 😀
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I hope so! It’s my goal to stick with it (thank you again!) and then try to get some other things written too. 🙂
I definitely think there are sadder ways to go. Lots of regret out there… Thanks for the feedback darlin’! xo
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it looks like the time has come. she’s going to greener pasture.
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Ha! Yes, another great green reference, Plaridel. Thanks for your feedback; I appreciate it!
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Great take on the prompt, the concentration on green creates a very evocative image
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Thanks so much Michael, and welcome to Tales From the Motherland. I appreciate your thoughtful feedback.
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A touching piece, Dawn, full of life’s delights.
And an ending that I suspect many of us will envy.
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Thanks so much CE; I always appreciate your feedback! Hope you are feeling back to yourself, and life is good?
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Life is wonderful here in paradise, thank you, but I still have a non-functioning right hand. Treatment continues, of course, for an as yet undiagnosed affliction.
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So sorry to hear that! Wish you were closer, geographically. I have a good friend here, who is one of the premier hand Drs in the US. It must be so frustrating for you!
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There’s a beautiful, free spirit in this. Very curious about the ending…her death is near somehow? An intriguing story.
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Thanks Emily; I appreciate your feedback. Welcome to Tales From the Motherland. I’m glad you stopped by. 🙂
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