The Middle: This Is A Test, This Is Only a (dildo) Test…


Warning: Adult content. This is not even for all adults. If the title scared you, run now!

This post is a test. Please ignore any words that seem out of (Breasts) character. This is only a test. Call me a big baby, but I’ve been stewing about my stats lately. I should be celebrating the fact that my subscriber number has gone up almost daily for a while now. I should be proudly bragging that two of my posts are featured in the new book Tangerine Tango, Women Writers Share Slices of Life. It’s a wonderful little (I do mean small) book that features 10 bloggers, sharing posts about life, humor, religion… life.  I’m proud to be a part of it, and extremely excited that all profits from sales on Amazon.com will be donated to the Huntington’s Disease Society of America (HDSA). For those of you who have followed me for a while, you know that my mother died of Huntington’s December 31, 2011. The disease has had and will continue to have a huge impact on my life. I’m grateful to Lisa Winkler (Cyclingrandma), the woman who put this book together, for choosing HDSA to support. I should be focused on my novel (finally edited) and starting to figure out the next step, toward publication.  I just signed up for NaNoWriMo, and for those of you who are sane enough to skip it don’t know what it is, it’s pure masochism- according to multiple sources. Writers sign up to produce 50,000 words, theoretically a novel, in 30 days: November 1-30.  I’m excited for the challenge. (Sex)

That’s right baby! We shall see…
image: highsnobiety.com

These are all great things.  I should be dwelling on that and not stewing about this: dropping stats. I’ve brooded and moaned and maybe stamped my feet, but the reality is that my numbers have gone down. The daily hits that is. Hits are the numbers that represent people visiting your blog. Visiting people, not necessarily reading your blog. If they subscribe to you and (More Sex) happen to open the email link that comes each time you post, and then say, “Eh, not interested today,” you still get a hit. If they hit a link that takes them to your post, that’s a hit. If they click on photos in your post those are all hits. If you have a lot of photos in a given post, and ten people open your blog post and also click on the photos, you may think you’ve had a decent day… when only 10 people actually visited your blog. See where I’m going here? The lower number of hits that I’ve had recently, are actually even lower!

Sorry Disney. How could I pass?
Image: memegenerator.com

It’s been suggested that I write shorter posts. It’s been suggested that I put provocative (Dildos) content. Sex, scandal, provocative topics bring hits apparently. True, I get no less than 4 hits per day just for my post Call Me Prissy Butt… Ironically, it’s a post I wrote a year ago+ about the over-sexualization of young girls and the trend toward ridiculous skimpy thong underwear. It’s this middle aged woman’s rant, really. But I get a tickle me Elmo kind of giggle each day, when I see that at leasst 4 fools sleeze bags guys (I doubt these are women) have checked in to see something about Butts, but get a lecture on oggling butts instead. Clearly, the word Butt brings in hits. I prefer to have real readers, who come for the content, but maybe some hits come for the butt or the 50 Shades and stay for other reasons. (More dildos)

So this has been a test. The issue of stats and how to build readership and interest is complicated. There’s luck (Freshly Pressed); there’s quality and content; and there is (Sex) (Breasts) (Penises) me plugging along and working to keep readers coming back. Will all of these subliminal words, that I’ve carefully hidden in this post, lead to more hits? Will my stats go up? This is only a test.

Tell me what you think. Are you a blogger too? Which of your posts send your stats up? Do you write to see the numbers go up, or do you write what you believe in…or is it a mix? Do those numbers distract you… push your buttons? Share your thoughts. Take a minute when you’re through and hit Like. Oh how my fragile heart will sing!

About Dawn Quyle Landau

Mother, Writer, treasure hunter, aging red head, and sushi lover. This is my view on life, "Straight up, with a twist––" because life is too short to be subtle! Featured blogger for Huffington Post, and followed on Twitter by LeBron James– for reasons beyond my comprehension.
This entry was posted in Awareness, Blog, Blogging, Daily Observations, Death of parent, Education, Freshly Pressed, getting published, Honest observations on many things, how blogs work, Humor, Huntington's Disease, Life, Musings, My world, News, Sarcasm, Tales From the Motherland, Women, Writing and tagged , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

21 Responses to The Middle: This Is A Test, This Is Only a (dildo) Test…

  1. Yay- book looks great in the sidebar! Thanks again for the shout-out- and readers are loving your contributions!
    Stats.. ummm…. I’ve never been FB. For some reason my Mallomars post from over a year ago gets attention EVERY day. Go figure. At least one or two if not a couple more. Last Sat. my Banned Book post from last year shot up the stats- it got 96- just that post-why? Who knows. No extra comments to go with the views. So I don’t fret about it. Maybe I should, or maybe I’m just not sexy enough. Oh well. All in good time.

    Like

  2. Haha! I did this sort of thing once when I was accepting an award.
    I think you’re a fantastic writer, Dawn. I’ve enjoyed everything you’ve written so far. I don’t look at my stats, heck I don’t even know where to find them. My motivation is just to have fun, at this point.
    The only thing that deters me from reading a post, on occassion, is the length. I’m talking in general. If someone’s post is too long and dense, I’ll either skim it or skip it. I follow too many and there’s only 24 hours in a day. Ha!
    Just keep doing what you do so well. I think you’ve got a quality blog.
    Congrats on all the success and good luck with the challenge. OMG, I could never do that!
    Have a great day!!!
    Lisa aka Grippy
    Hey, I just realized, as soon as someone gave me a nickname people started coming over. Coincidence? Maybe that’s what’s missing? I’ll be thinking. Haha!

    Like

    • One more thing… I was just looking around at other blogs and I feel like sometimes it’s very high schoolish, like a popularity contest. There are certain people that have, what I call, “post parties,” going on at their blogs. It’s like a giant get together. Once I became a regular commenter on certain blogs my “Likes” went way up. I’m not sure if it’s worth it. I sometimes feel obligated to show up even when I don’t want to. haha! Sorry for the ramble – just making observations.

      Like

      • I was going to say that… but left it out here. I have a second post in the works that addresses that too. Yes, I am not as frequent with comments, etc. I have a few people that I’ve gotten in the habit of commenting on, or who I know like to hear from readers. I get very few Likes, overall, and even fewer comments. It bothers me sometimes, that I have consistently visited others’ sites and hit Like/and commented, and gotten nothing or not consistently, back… so I stopped worrying about it. I read a lot of posts now, without leaving a calling card. 😉

        Like

    • That seems to be the best approach Lisa… the healthiest. But then, I have all kinds of issues! 😉 I’d tell you where your stats are (that line that looks like a cardiac rhythm at the top of your page, click it) but then you too might fall down the hole… Um, though I do believe in freedom of choice.

      Like

  3. harperfaulkner says:

    You’re kinda, sorta, funny, so, you’ve got that going for you. And, I’ve read worse blogs. And, you have 200 more followers than I do, so, quit complaining! I’m happy with my faithful 300. They feel like family. Do you really want a follower who comes to your sight looking for penises. Or is it peni? Anyway, keep up the work, ah, I mean the good work. Yours truly, Harper Faulkner, the writer grateful that any one reads any thing he writes.

    Like

    • I’m just grateful that YOU read my blogs HF. That tickles me each and every time… almost as much as the Tickle Me Elmo tickled I get when people do come just for penises. (I believe that is the prober plural.) Thanks for the reminder though… I do love my regulars. 🙂

      Like

      • harperfaulkner says:

        Hmmm, “prober plural.” I only point it out because you were making a grammer point and then you made a mistake. See the irony, there. It’s not quite as good as spelling grammar, grammer, but still, good. Also, I consider myself to be an irregular. There is very little regular about me. Enjoying you today and your tales from the darkside–I mean, motherland. HF

        Like

        • Oh damn! I hate that… see, maybe I need to quit. I can’t bear the scrutiny of grammar and spelling too! Or irony for that matter. That’s capital M, Motherland, for the record. But I concede to darkside, depending on the day. It’s 7:40 here, and still dark! Not to mention my mood… don’t mention it. Thanks HF. You do indeed make me smile.

          Like

  4. mamaheidi60 says:

    I think I’ve read every post and I’ve had the variety of responses you might guess – some I totally identify with, some I find thought provoking, some are just down right entertaining.I think I usually connect with something you write about which is why I keep reading. I like your style of writing and hope to read your novels in the future. I don’t always hit like when I’m finished or send a comment. Lazy? Running out the door? Don’t know what to say? All of the above? But, I do encourage you to continue writing. I guess you must be asking yourself if you are writing for yourself or if you are writing for your audience. Tricky question because how does one answer affect what you write differently from another answer?

    Like

    • Thank you Sensei! I am always grateful for your feedback and encouragement. Yes, some days feel like I’m working hard and I’m not sure about the impact… or reach. That is frustrating, depending on my mood. It would be hard to stop writing, but there are indeed days when it’s tempting. I am sincerely, truly honored that you continue to return and read my posts. Thanks mamaheidi!

      Like

  5. Lynn Carroll says:

    Stick with content and don’t worry about stats. To quote a famous movie, “if you build it,they will come.” (And I mean that in a totally nonsexual way although if you think it will help…) 😉 Just wanted you to know that I shared your blog about Malala Yousafzai with my juniors at school. Got ’em to think for at least a few minutes about why they’re there. Keep it up. You might not hit the mark every time but you hit it often enough. 🙂

    Like

    • Thanks Lynn! That means a lot. I’m really touched/honored/proud that you would share that piece with your students. What? I don’t hit the mark every time??! (don’t quote my punctuation usage please…) Thanks for taking the time to share your thoughts. Much appreciated on this gray, dark day.

      Like

  6. Valery says:

    Luke! Do not cross over to the dark side!
    Do what you love and love what you do. Keep it simple. And remember, high school cliques are sooooo 30-years-ago. 😉

    Like

  7. Off Duty Mom says:

    I love to check the search terms for my blog. People have found me by searching “Sexy mom fuck son,” “Duty to fuck,” “Old woman loves sex” and “Messy hair, bow and arrow sex.” I don’t remember writing about any of those things…

    🙂

    Like

    • That actually made me LOL, Off Duty Mom! Hilarious! Yes, I find some very, very strange ones sometimes, but lots of “young girls in underwear,” “underwear” and last week I got “sniffing butts!” I’d like to have more “clever writing,” “intelligent thoughts,” you know… the stuff I do! 😉 Thanks for taking the time. I hope you’ll check out some other posts (I’d hate to think you came only for the dildos) and leave comment!

      Like

  8. etomczyk says:

    Hi Dawn. As someone who subscribes to you, I think you should not worry about any of this stuff and just write! Didn’t you once tell me that you were writing because you loved it. Don’t worry about the length but make the subject matter something that you believe in. The only key that I have found that causes people to read blogs and to return to them is if the way the subject matter is presented makes them laugh. We are so stressed out as Americans that someone who sees the quirky side of life and makes us LOL is someone that will bring us back to their site again and again and make our hearts merry. I’m pulling for you. All the best!

    Like

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